Our Vacuum Sucks

His ~ Her Different Takes Monte's Take

Many of my posts you will find will be the inherent difference in which my wife and I see things. This indeed is such a post.


The set up:

My wife decided to clean the pantry today. This by itself will be a whole post dedicated to me (the saver) and her (the thrower away-er). Suffice to say that this is a NO MAN ZONE for any of you that may be contemplating helping your wife clean a pantry. It is for me anyway.

She was to a point where she needed to vacuum out the shelves and she came and found me.  She said…I need to vacuum the shelves. Without missing a beat she said, shall I use the Shop Vac or that piece of shit that blows dust all over the house? I promptly replied…MY answer was already in the question and without missing a beat, I proceeded to go fetch the Shop Vac from the shop. Smart move I must say but, that is not all of the story.

So about the vacuum….

See, several years ago I found a fantastic yard-sale find. It was (and still is for that matter) a great vacuum. Kirby, I think but that does not really matter. Now keep in mind this was several years ago and, well, things have a tendency to wear out. I however am “the saver” of the family. If the thing is still turning on then by-god I can get it to work. I have without a doubt repaired that $10.00 yard sale find at least 20 times. Each time I proudly walk back into the house and proclaim “See honey, good as new” to which she nods, smiles and (usually) cringes. I typically ignore the cringes. I have learned that no good can come from acknowledging a cringe…wait. That was just a squirrel moment so back to the vacuum….

My beautiful wife after the last few rounds of my repairs has been complaining how the vacuum is now spitting dust when she vacuums. I have done my best to ignore that. You see here is my interpretation of how much it blows…


I keep telling her that “it’s just a little dust” whenever I see it in operation,  the picture above is (I feel) an accurate representation of how much dust it blows. Now let’s change the viewpoint a bit. To hear her describe the dust blowing debacle. It would be a slightly bigger problem…





I believe in her mind that the above pictures would be an accurate representation of the vacuum in operation. I am going to call foul on this. This is just ridiculous. I can fix this thing. “On it” I say and off to the shop to fix the vacuum again.

I return and hand it off for her to give it a whirl. “Great” she said and away I went to the office. She proceeded (about 15 minutes later) to come find me in the office and said…”you need to see the house”. This in and of it’s self is terrifying but coupled with the fact that I recently handed her a repaired household appliance…I really didn’t want to go in the house….

This is what I opened the door to find…. burning-man-nevada-598-760x481


I’m gonna go get her a new vacuum next week.


Yours Truly

Monte Tareski

Monte Tareski